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Remember When?

Many times I think back to my first encounter with Jesus Christ. I was at the top of a four-story parking garage, contemplating whether life was worth living. My parents were just separating, my brother was doing drugs and running wild and my mother was on her death bed with Lupus. It appeared that life wasn’t as precious as people spoke about. I was only 14 and already had bought into the lie that I was born to fail. I remember reaching up to the heavens with one last desperate hope, saying “God if you’re real you better show me, please help.” And then He spoke. He took time to speak to me, or maybe I was finally at a point where I was able to hear. When Christ speaks it changes you. From that day forward I knew He was real. Have you ever had one of those times where you remember the time and date where you realized He was real? What He did for you? The pain He took on Himself, so that we could live. I began to cry…no, I began to bawl! You see there’s crying then there’s the ugly cry! That’s when you’re crying so hard that you can’t breathe! You’re choking on your snot, feeling you may just die. But I didnt care! Because someone chose to love me, despite who I was. But then as time goes by you become more dignified, you learn how to form your prayers the “right” way–praying the prayers that everyone likes. You become adept at learning what to say and what not to say and how to say it. You forget about the time you did the “ugly cry” or if you do you remember it’s with a tinge of embarrassment. You forget about how messed up you were when He first found you. You even might start to say “I’m really proud of where I came from,” forgetting it wasn’t you who brought you out. That’s why I like to remember the time He first came to me, it brings me back to what’s important–back to who’s important. Take time to reflect, to remember when. Much love!!

One thought on “Remember When?

  1. Jacqueline Miller says:

    OMG Jason thats deep. I can totaly identify with you. I would love to share my story with you sometime. When I first herd you tell this story at the gz spring retreat I cryed my eyes out. Have a fantasticaly great day Jason 🙂 remember youve got a friend in PA!! Me!!!!!!

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